So many times we stood together in the choir.
She at one side, and my best friend at the other side.

We were young first sopranos and we could handle the rest of the choir and the world.

There were days that the empty corridors of the school harboured our voices after a choirrehearsel.

The resounding walls heard our improvised close harmony variations on the songs we'd just enjoyed and not seldom the conductor got a surprise during a performance because we made a perfect fit between our improvisations and the choir.

How secure we felt during those hours, and how happy.

Outside those wonderful hours we were ordinairy schoolgirls, students and later mothers.



We saw each other again even before the school reunion.
ofcourse at the rehearsal of the reunion choir.

We shifted places as long as needed to stand beside each other.
She in the middle of the choir.

Her life had made her feel very secure and the happy look in her eyes made everybody smile.

We were so pleased to be together again that we made plans to sing again .... "when the children are a bit older".

I met her husband and children. And recognised myself in her reactions.

And we sang.
Beside me I heard her full soprano merging with my voice.
We didn't dare to improvise during the reunion service, but, unseen for others, we shared our emotions.

When I saw my old dear friend among the people my voice got clouded by tears and I had to keep silent for a minute. She pushed me with her arm and gave me a wink.

Not much later she went silent and took a paper hankie our of my bag to take her tears away.

After the service, when we took our things we talked about hoe surprised we'd been by the deep emotions we felt.
For a while we stood with our backs to the world, just being in each others present, sharing unworded emotions.
Then we hugged and laughed and had to share all those stories

The day she died abroad I was thinking about her. Cried without knowing why. And asked myself when we would see each other again.

We'll never see each other again.


She was as old as I am and her life was very fulfilling
Many people will miss her.

A feeling that something is wrong pushed its way into my thought.
It's not fair: ... her husband... her children...
She could have done so much more if only she'd been given more time.

I even feel guilty because I'm outliving her.


Now the circle of friends of the old days is broken.
I'll never anymore hear her firm voice beside me.
Never see her smile and hear her light laugh.

In me is a hug that isn't ended.


Dear M.
I know you won't rest in peace,
because you'll go on smiling and talking
and being there for others.

The memories of special moments
will always stay with me,
and at times I'll sing songs with your memory.

I miss you!!!